Thought of the day
Can men and women truly be friends. I used to think so. Now not so sure.
Is it just to complicated. If anyone actually reads this what do you think?
Is it just to complicated. If anyone actually reads this what do you think?
posted by diogo at 1:47 AM
7 Comments:
Some people say that you can't be friends with members of the other sex. Personally, my male friends are better friends than my female friends. However sometimes i feel that theres a level that cannot be crossed, something that gets held back in my relationships with males.
Honestly I was told a couple of times that men and women can't truly be friends. I made it my mission to prove that wrong... And I honestly do have a lot of guy friends that I actually trust more than many girlfriends for the simple reason that there is no comparison or competition that can arise between a guy and a girl. However, there has to be a limit as to how close the relationship gets because from my experience, one of the two (the guy or the girl) usually starts developping feelings because they start to consider each other as potential mates and not just buddies. So I guess its all about how close the guy and the girl get but its good to not be too naive and make sure that the line isn't crossed even though the guy might be comfortable with the situation the girl might not be and and not the girl or vice versa. Its good to stay aware.
So, your answers are no. Not unless one is married, in a relationship, gay, or simply unattractive to each other. For if a relationship can't grow or one has to pull back from time to time then whats the point. For two straight friends of the same gender will continue to strengthen their friendship as years go by. It seems that for all of human's logic and development our animalistic nature always comes out.
no, i disagree. the limitations on male/female friendships where both individuals are relatively attractive and both single or not... whatever, are different than the limitations on same sex friendships, but limitations do not intimate that the friendship is not real. we take each other as we come, accept the level of intimacy that can be appropriately reached, integrate each other into our lives as much as possible. that's true with 2 women, 2 men, or 1 man 1 woman.
some of my best friends are men. some of my best friends are women. the relationships are different but they are very true.
hehehe this is fun !! I haven't been back since I commented. And its cool to see that more was said. I like what you're saying too Kristin the fact that the relationships are different doesn't meant they are not real or true. Like I mentioned on the trust level attractiveness or no I do tend to confide more in my guy friends (does that mean I am closer to them?) and how does one judge closeness. And knowing that a friend of the opposite sex is attracted to you can have different effects on people. Some people choose to ignore it, sometimes it just goes away. Sometimes depending on who else is involved in the "relationship" shyt happens. But this doesn't mean that we cant all be close friends because whether the friends are of the same sex or of opposite sex, how many of those friends do we consider our best friends? People we can talk to without ever wondering about how they will judge us. People we can discuss anything with including things that they are involved in? Real genuine friendships are rare. And I love analyzing certain friendships just to figure out what the two get out of it. why are they still friends? And whether both parties feel the same way about each other! Its quite fascinating! In a weird kind of way these are all grey areas. Its hard to say "yes" or "no" Diogo
Thanks for the input. Quite interesting.
Interesting topic here. Most of my friends are guys - they are easier to talk to, less complicated and surprisingly better listeners.
I have to agree with Kristin... friendships between the same sex is different than friendships with the opposite sex but both are equally real and true. Yes there are lines that shouldn't be crossed but you only become aware of the lines when you're looking for it. When I become close friends with a guy, I don't automatically think, "oh hey he's a guy, i'm a girl, we are friends and here are the rules..." I talk about almost anything to my guy friends and vice versa.
Post a Comment
<< Home